(Who Are You?)

I'm sure that I could write a few pages in response to this question. Lots of stories to tell... about how I got to know the net, about the experiences I've had with people online... but I'll try to be brief. I don't want to bore the pee out of anyone.


I ask who you are, in the sense of who you are online....do you lie, if so, why would/do you?

I don't lie. There are sins of omission, but even with those things, if I'm asked, I tell the truth... unless someone asks me my address in order to come to my house and get into a physical altercation. I'm a lucky person... I've made some wonderful, loyal friends in my life. If someone showed up at my door for that reason, they'd last all of 5 seconds... then I'd either be in court while my friends were on trial for murder, or I'd be locked up the rest of my life.... neither of which is something I want to go through or put my friends through. The way I see it, the only lie worth telling is one that is in self-defense or in the defense of a loved one. Lies are "evil" to me. Given, truth is transient, but there's a big difference between a transient truth and an outright lie.

Do you create a persona that you would like others to see you as, or is it the "other side" of you that most aren't allowed to see, or that you can't be IRL?

I am the same online as off. Who I am varies... that's an MPD thing... but my system reflects online the same way it will reflect off. There's nothing that I am online that I am not offline... unless it is for safety reasons. For example, although I really don't care who online knows that I'm Intersexed, I do care offline. I don't go into dangerous or potentially violent situations offline. I don't like jail, I don't like institutions, and I don't like violence. Online people can hurl all the words they want, offline it's often not just words that are hurled. Closed minded people are just idiotic online, offline they can be the cause of needing plastic surgery, hospitalization, or a body bag. Doesn't matter if I "win" the fight or they do.... one of us is going to end up in a bad way. That's not something I want in my life.

Do you know who you are by now, yet are still asking questions and seeking answers?

I'm always trying to learn. We all change as we grow, and so there's always something new to learn about oneself. I know who I am at the core... (or in MPD language: We know who we are as a system and as individual cores) but there's always something to learn. Life rarely stagnates... it's part of the beauty in it. I ask so many questions that I had to go and create this site. *chuckles* I know who I am, and who that is is always growing and changing.

What would you do if you found out someone has lied to you, someone that you had trusted so much that it almost seemed impossible that a lie could be uttered from their mouth? Someone that told you lies about others,and sadly you were influenced by what they had said because they were so convincing?

Remove that person from my life. Take the time to mourn, then pick myself up, dust myself off, and attempt to learn from the painful experience. Repeat to myself over and over "No pain, no gain" and "It could have been worse" as I make my way to the next lesson.


Could you live with yourself for trying to be open minded, and yet so totally stupid for falling into the "trap"?

Trusting people is not stupid, it's loving. I, personally, hate loving people. Love hurts... and it takes A LOT of strength to love. I often don't feel strong enough to love. I'm just too full of fear.

Could it be possible that this person was simply feeding you lies and "eating" up your emotions, if so, what would you do?

Again... walk away. Love yourself for a while. You deserve a break from the heavy task of loving others... and you deserve your own love at least as much as those others do.