"~Strokes" re-post & comment reply

I'll be forever perplexed as to why the "Book of Blogs" people chose this entry, over all the rest of mine, to publish.

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(comment 11:16am)
The truth cuts right to the bone sometime. Makes me think why it is that I am really doing this written journey here, online...am I really doing it for the right reasons? Huh!?! Gotta think about that.

(my reply 7:44pm)
Well, I was being a little hard on myself at the time, too. It's not ALL about ego... I don't think. Sometimes, it's just about wanting to feel human... to feel like I actually exist and matter... and wanting to connect with people who MIGHT get it.

I do go through phases of despising myself.... and sometimes, I write during those times.... and sometimes I start relationships during those times, with people who help me despise myself more.

What can I say? I have holes in my brain. :\