The story (peanut butter)

I had a phone conversation with J., and it helped to open my eyes a little about what the actual problem is. See... I just couldn't get it. It's not that A. means to hurt people. It's not that she really forgets. Too, it's not only me that she affects this way... I just have a lot more sore spots than most. Tell A. you're allergic to peanuts, and she'll fix you a peanut butter sandwich. Why? Not because she doesn't know, or because she "forgot". She just thinks that because peanut butter tastes so good to HER, it will also taste good to you. It's the attitude of, it's not that you don't like being touched, it's just that you never had ME touch you.

A. doesn't get that when people say something, it's based on a lifetime of experience. Yes, she's just trying to "make people happy", but she's thinking that everyone is just like her... that everyone just needs to be "enlightened".