There are, actually, more than words here. When you get to know someone, you do get to know what their words mean... personalities emerge... There are also a few "empaths" on the board.
I think that we're down to something like 28 members... I'm not yet sure if that number will drop even further. With the ones that remain though... we're all very different people. We don't have identical lives, amounts of energy, time, or ways of speaking/typing. I can post rules and ask people to follow them, but those rules are there as "guidelines", not as do or die statements. We've all broken those rules at one time or another. Everyone has a bad day. We all get ticked off now and again. We all trip over our egos now and again.
With banning people, I don't ban them for no reason... but more than that, I don't even ban them for breaking a rule. Again, we've all broken at least one of the rules at least once. When I ban someone it's because not only have they broken the rules repeatedly, but their actions equate to this wonderful emoticon:
When you see that a person is infuriated beyond belief, then is not the time to keep pushing them. Speaking of the rules, my saying "If I ask you to stop doing something, stop doing it." ties in with this. It's rare that I angrily ask a person to stop doing something. By the time I say something like "Start posting or get the hell off my board!", or "Stop being such a fucking prick!", I'm beyond rational.
Whether or not I'm right... whether or not the person I'm talking to is right doesn't matter. When I ask you to stop doing something, stop doing it. Why? Because when a person is irrational, they can't reason. If you attempt to argue with an irrational person, and they have the keys to the ban button, you're doing nothing other than begging to be banned. Best thing to do is to stop poking. Put the stick down and let the person collect themself. Apologize. Make nice. Then, when the person is rational again, address your issue a little differently, you might get better results. (If the person sees you with the same stick again, they're liable to beat you to death with it.)
You can't reason with someone who is foaming at the mouth, but if you wait until they stop foaming, it's highly possible that you'll be able to.
Yes, miscommunications happen very easily online... but it's usually obvious when a person is upset. Some of us are more prone to getting upset than others... especially those of us who love others on the board. "Love" makes a person vulnerable. The expectations go up... both offline and online.
My relationships with the members of this board vary, and so my "expectations" vary. With some, like T., I expect little. He was new. Same with someone like Kx. Although they're real to me, because I barely know them, I don't expect them to act in the same manner as say someone like RBW or (dad-unit). As well, my reactions to people leaving will vary. Sk. wanting to leave made me so upset I couldn't sleep. T. leaving, although it bothers me, will not cause me to react the same way.
We're all different. Our relationships vary, and our abilities vary. They vary from person to person, and vary day to day. I'm not unaware of that... but I do hope/expect to be treated like Helen Keller. I'll go the extra mile to learn how to communicate online with you because I want to communicate with you, and if you desire to communicate with me, you'll go the extra mile to learn how to communicate with me. If we do that... I think that it ends up being pretty darn real.
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