~and the band played on

My head is everywhere... yet being pulled.


A friend of mine fell in love and ran off to Arizona to meet her man. It went well... very well.

I jumped inside... What are you doing?!!!! All I could think of was not wanting my friend to be hurt. All I could think of was that time I ran off to Utah... and was hurt... and the time I was going to run off to Georgia... and was hurt. Hurt hurt hurt.


I'm staring West, wanting to do it again... soon... as soon as possible... Exploding inside... writhing in torment and ecstacy... it's happening again...

not again


I don't WANT again. I want NEW. I want DIFFERENT. I want the REAL thing... not let down... not betrayal... not having to go through the motions because I don't have the balls to say "Honey, it's not right" the second I look into her eyes and KNOW it's ALL wrong. I want this to be as REAL as it feels... as DIFFERENT as it feels.... as new... as old... as intense...


fucking Internet

fucking distance

fucking heart.